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Star Trek: The Next Generation

The Canonical Drinking Game

Compiled by: Mark Yocom

Special Thanks To:

Raymond Chen Christopher Becker Pat (SPAM) John Graziano Robert Tarr John Connelly Michael McDaniel Stan Paszt Alpha Theta Coeducational Fraternity [Electro Productions] Scott Parish Stefanie L. Lawson Raoul Rodriguez Donald Simmons Joshua A. Laff =========================================================================== Requirements: Episode(s) of ST:TNG This list People (the more the merrier) Beverages of your choice

Instructions: Simple. Watch the show, and whenever a condition is met, take the appropriate number of drinks. The definition of "drink" should be decided before game play starts. Usually, a good mouthful will suffice. Optional rules are included at the end of the list for fun variations on the "standard" game.

Compiler's Note: I would advise taking some time before game play starts to decide which conditions to use and which to ignore. Remember that this list is canonical, so you probably will _not_ want to use them all (especially with a new episode, since you'll spend all your time reading the list, rather than watching). Please send any corrections, suggestions, requests, submissions, flames, etc. to the address listed above.

=========================================================================== Category: Condition : Number of Drinks =========================================================================== General : "Open hailing frequencies" : 1 Quotes : "Medical emergency" : 1 : "Belay that order" : 1 : "Energize" : 1 : "Hell", "Damn" and other swearing. : 1 : SEE ALSO: Riker's special swearing rules. : : "It's not like anything I've ever seen before": 1 : "Impossible" : 1 : "Impossible" while watching the "impossible" : 2 : "Shut up, Wesley" : 3 : "On screen" : 1 : "Understood" : 1 : "Set phasers on..." : 1 : "Acknowledged" : 1 : "Priority One" : 1 : "Just a little more time...!" : 1 : "Eastern/Western/Southern/Northern Continent" : 2 : "The Klingon Home Planet" or other reference : : without actually giving it a name : 2 --------------------------------------------------------------------------- General : A female crewmember has flawless makeup after : Actions : she's been put through the ringer : 1 : A crewmember straightens his/her uniform : 1 ea. : SEE ALSO: Picard's special uniform rules. : : A crewmember drinks (outside of 10 Forward) : 1 ea. : SEE ALSO: Picard's special drinking rules.: : A bridge officer is seen in casual clothes : 1 ea. : SEE ALSO: Picard's & Beverly's special : : clothing rules. : : A bridge officer is seen in dress uniform : 1 ea. : "Ensign Ethnic" or "Ensign Buxom" gets a line : 1 : Someone is referred to by their first name : 1 : First names while sexual tension present : 2 : The sarcophagus is used in sickbay : 2 : Nobody leaves the ship, but we still see more : : than one room of the alien ship/planet/etc: 2 : The same matte painting of an alien planet is : : used after each commercial break : 1 : The matte painting has a moving ground vehicle: 2 : Transporter Room 3 is used : 1 : A shuttlecraft appears unsafe : 1 : Someone reads a book : 1 : Mention of dilithium crystals : 1 : Someone adopts a persona (Dixon Hill, Sherlock: : Holmes, etc.) : 1 ea. : Someone receives a shot : 1 : Someone receives a shot from a non-medical : : officer : 2 : A new alien has latex on its forehead : 1 : A new alien also has differently shaped hands : 1 : A new alien doesn't have latex on its forehead: 2 : Someone preaches the Prime Directive : 1 : Someone other than Picard preaches the P.D. : 2 : Someone preaches about "Humanity's Unique : : Potential" : 1 : An "Old Earth Saying" is brought up : 1 : A member of the bridge crew takes over a : : by pushing someone out of the way : 2 : Someone wakes up from a nightmare : 1 : The bridge crew contemplates mutiny : 3 : The holodeck appears in its "natural" state : 2 : Holodeck characters become aware of their own : : ephemerality : 2 : Someone implies that 10 Forward is a Happening: : Place : 1 : They fade to commercial playing the "ominous : : horns" : 1 : They fade to commercial with a soap-opera-like: : close up on someone's face : 1 : The Enterprise is hurled somewhere by another : : force (Q, Tin Man, etc.) : 2 : Klingon is spoken : 1 : English is spoken by Klingons when they are : : alone and have no reason to speak English : 2 : Picard or Riker order a course change by : : exact X, Y, and Z coordinates, rather than: : something like "Set course for Starbase 8": 3 : The computer makes that "I'm listening" chirp : 1 : An "expendable" is killed : 1 ea. : A new alien ship is revealed : 1 : Something escapes the sensors : 1 : Something escapes the sensors and they use the: : word "interference" as an excuse : 2 : Communications malfunction/go out : 1 : Transporter goes down : 1 : A token alien is shown in the background : : and has no lines : 1 : The token alien is a Vulcan : 2 : Yellow Alert : 1 : Red Alert : 2 : Intruder Alert : 3 : The Enterprise docks at a starbase : 3 : Another Captain or Starfleet Command officer : : is shown : 1 : A desk hologram is seen : 2 : There is a countdown : 1 : Someone stops the countdown : 2 : Bridge command is handed over : 1 : The Enterprise avoids a conflict rather than : : using force : 1 : The Enterprise actually fights (shots must be : : fired) : 2 : Someone uses the episode's title in a sentence: 2 : The saucer section separates : Whole Beverage : They contact someone via communicator or : : intercom without activating it : 1 : Communicators don't work : 1 : Communicators are out of range : 2 : The battle bridge is used : 1 : The battle bridge is used with the saucer : : section still attached : 2 : TNG contradicts a fact stated in TOS : 2 : Dialogue in the turbolift : 1 : A poker game is shown : 1 : A log entry is made : 1 : A log entry is made - not by Picard : 2 : A stardate is mentioned - not in a log entry : 1 : An Old Earth Date is mentioned : 2 : Someone requests that an image on the main : : viewer be magnified : 1 : Someone requests magnification when it's : : painfully obvious that it's necessary : 2 : Readings go off the scale : 1 : The ship/crew is seconds away from disaster : 1 : Someone removes their communicator : 1 : Someone places their communicator on something: : so it can be beamed away or destroyed : 2 : Someone gives their communicator to a non- : : crewmember so they can communicate with : : the Enterprise : 3 : The transporter room can't lock on to someone : 1 : The transporter room pulls someone through : : after their ship explodes : 2 : Someone who normally pronounces "sensors" as : : "SEN-sers" pronounces it as "SEN-sohrs" : 1 : Someone brings up the matter/antimatter ratio : 1 : A member of the bridge crew looks WAY too : : pleased with him/herself : 1 : A Captain's Log entry is made by someone other: : than Picard : 2 : A sound effect from TOS is heard : 1 : The camera pans > 90 degrees to show how BIG : : the ship is : 1 : Someone changes their pronunciation of a word : : within the same scene : 1 : Someone throws/is hit by/etc. styrofoam props : 1 : Someone quotes Shakespeare, etc. (See Picard) : 1 : A bad fight scene occurs : 1 : The Enterprise is taken over : 1 : The weapons are rendered useless : 1 : Phasers are used for a different function than: : intended (e.g. overload, power : : a transporter, etc.) : 1 : Harmonics are changed in shields/phasers/etc. : 1 : Someone alludes to a work/person/event/etc. : : that hasn't been made/existed/happened yet: 1 : A guest appearance is made by someone from TOS: 3 : Security alert or request : 1 : Part of a set is destroyed in a fistfight : 2 : A succession of five face closeups with no : : dialogue : 1 : A shuttlecraft is launched : 2 : A probe is launched : 1 : Someone mentions Jack Crusher : 2 : Someone is seen out of uniform (in civvies) : 2 : The Enterprise is boarded by hostiles : 2 : The warp engine light goes really fast : 2 : The auto-destruct sequence is activated : 3 : A principle character is put on trial : 1 : The Enterprise is captured in a nebula/cloud : 1 : A star returns from the dead : Whole Beverage : Ancient alien technology screws things up : 1 : Someone is transported to somewhere other than: : a transporter room or sickbay from : : somewhere other than a transporter room : 2 : The Enterprise encounters an unknown energy : : form : 1 =========================================================================== Picard : "Make it so" : 1 Quotes : "Engage" : 1 : "Come" : 1 : "Come" (in personal quarters) : 2 : "Captain's Log" : 1 : "Captain's Log, Supplemental" : 2 : "Proceed" : 1 : "Number One" : 1 : "The boy" in reference to Wesley : 1 --------------------------------------------------------------------------- Picard : Straightens his uniform : 2 Actions : Straightens his uniform before giving a speech: 3 : Drinks : 2 : Drinks tea : 3 : Drinks tea identified as Earl Grey : 4 : Wears chest-revealing bedwear : 2 : Has an accident or is attacked : 2 : Accident or attack draws blood : 3 : Is possessed : 4 : Requests a Level One Diagnostic : 1 : Makes a speech that saves the day : 1 : Tries to avoid Lwuxana Troi : 1 : Surrenders : 1 : Leaves the ship : 1 : Leaves the ship to lead an away team : 2 : Demonstrates knowledge of a foreign language : 1 : Swears/hurls an insult in a foreign language : 2 : Appears uncomfortable (around women, children): 1 : Quotes Shakespeare, etc. : 2 : Leaves the bridge during a crisis to talk with: : Dr. Crusher or Guinan : 1 : Talks about death to Dr. Crusher : 1 : Takes a communique from Starfleet in his ready: : room : 1 : Is called upon to mediate a dispute : 2 : Takes the helm in a tricky situation : 3 : Is seen on the bridge out of uniform : 2 : Calls a meeting : 1 : Calls a meeting in the middle of a crisis : 2 : Cries : Whole Beverage =========================================================================== Worf : "Impressive" : 1 Quotes : "Admirable" : 1 : "Grrrrr" (A simple sneer qualifies) : 1 : "I am a Klingon" : 1 : "Klingons do NOT..." : 1 : "Security Override!" : 2 : "Human women are too fragile" : 2 --------------------------------------------------------------------------- Worf : Uses the word "human" in a sense meaning puny,: Actions : weak, or otherwise >not< Klingon : 2 : Gets beat up : 1 : Actually wins a fight : 2 : Throws someone in the brig/Arrests someone : 1 : Asks for an explanation of a human term/custom: 1 : Says something with a tilt of his head/nod : 1 : Has a suggestion shot down offhandedly : 2 : Fusses about his discommendation : 2 : Makes a reference to his sexual prowess : 2 : Mentions or participates in some bizarre : : Klingon ritual : 2 =========================================================================== Data : "Fascinating" : 1 Quotes : "Accessing" : 1 : "Inquiry" : 1 : "Intriguing" : 1 : "I am an android" : 1 : "I cannot feel emotions", etc : 1 : "Increase speed" : 1 --------------------------------------------------------------------------- Data : Uses his strength : 1 Actions : Uses his strength and shows up Worf : 2 : Uses his superior android speed : 1 : Innards are revealed : 1 : Innards are revealed other than his head : 2 : Is cut off mid-sentence : 1 : Is cut off during a list of synonyms : 2 : Stops himself during an inappropriate speech : 2 : Has to have "An Old Earth Saying" explained : 2 : Gives a list of synonyms for the term he did : : not understand : 1 : Is able to interpret/use alien technology in : : no time : 1 : Uses a new colloquialism : 1 : Uses a contraction : Whole Beverage : Affects a human mannerism (e.g. Sherlock Data): 2 : Corrects somebody's grammar : 1 : Brent Spiner breaks character for comic effect: 1 : Gives an "approximation" out to several : : decimal places : 1 : Does that little head twitch : 1 : Gets kissed, etc. : 3 : Is told that he's more human than he thinks : 2 : Is "used" to save the ship, beam down, or hang: : around infected people because the : : situation is too dangerous for humans : 3 =========================================================================== Riker : "Hell" : 2 Quotes : "What the hell is going on?" : Whole Beverage : "You are personally responsible for the : : Captain's safety" to Worf : 2 : "With pleasure, sir" : 1 --------------------------------------------------------------------------- Riker : Walks forward as if he's trying to knock an : Actions : imaginary door down with his forehead : 1 : Demonstrates knowledge of a foreign language : 1 : Swears/hurls an insult in a foreign language : 2 : Thrusts his chin out with a smug look : 1 : Stands with his feet more than 2 ft. apart :1 per ' beyond 2' : Pronounces a word in a way that does not match: : his heritage (e.g. charade=shur-AHD) : 2 : Acts blatantly like Kirk : 1 : Gets that annoying smirk on his face : 1 : Gets the girl : 1 : Gets the girl for no apparent reason : 2 =========================================================================== LaForge : "...lost a lotta good people down there..." : 1 Quotes : "Maybe not" in response to "Impossible" : 2 : "I'm workin' on it!" : 1 --------------------------------------------------------------------------- LaForge : VISOR is taken or knocked off : 1 Actions : Tweaks the warp engines/shields/tractor beams : 1 : Wishes he had human vision : 1 : Is used as a "human tricorder" : 1 : Sees with his own eyes (VISORless) : Whole Beverage : Interacts with a woman (real or not) in the : : holodeck : 2 =========================================================================== Beverly : "This won't hurt a bit" : 1 Quotes : "This shouldn't be happening" : 1 : "Nothing yet, but we're working on it" : 1 : "He's dead <pause>" : 1 : "He's gone..." : 2 : "This man is dying!" : 3 --------------------------------------------------------------------------- Beverly : Can't figure out some bizarre medical problem : 1 Actions : Uses the word "stumped" in regards to problem : 2 : Is seen in a sweater : 2 : Beams directly to sickbay or orders someone to: : be beamed directly to sickbay : 1 : Is seen on the bridge for no apparent reason : 1 : Appears without her lab coat : 1 : Appears without her lab coat in sickbay : 2 : Uses one of her ridiculous 24th century : : medical terms : 1 : Performs major surgery : 2 : Diagnoses something really obvious : 1 : Shows maternal instinct : 2 : Loses a patient : 2 =========================================================================== Deanna : "What do YOU think about that?" or other quote: Quotes : reminiscent of ELIZA : 1 : "Are you troubled?" (when they obviously are) : 1 : "Mother! Please...!" : 1 --------------------------------------------------------------------------- Deanna : Senses something really shocking : 1 Actions : Gives us Betazoid insight into something : : really obvious : 2 : Senses (and lists) more than one emotion : 1 : Cries : 2 : Is hit on : 1 : Rolls her eyes : 1 : Can't shut out all the feelings : 1 =========================================================================== O'Brien : Has a line in a first or second season episode: 1 Actions : Disables a weapon during transport : 1 =========================================================================== Wesley : "It's easy!" (or "simple", etc.) : 1 Quotes : "Wow", "Gee", "Ooh", etc. : 1 --------------------------------------------------------------------------- Wesley : Talks back to his mom : 1 Actions : Saves the day : 1 : Saves the day and nobody understands his : : pseudoscientific babbling : 2 : Saves the day and nobody thanks him : 2 : Appears to be hitting on someone : 1 : Gets that annoying "impish" grin : 1 : Creates some spiffy new science project : 1 : Gets that "I'm not just a kid" attitude : 1 : Swallows really hard : 1 : Has his life threatened : 2 : Has his life threatened and he dies : Party like it's : : 1999! : Is seen with a girl (other than when on duty) : 3 =========================================================================== Lwuxana : "Little One" in reference to Deanna : 1 --------------------------------------------------------------------------- Lwuxana : Reads Picard's mind (or pretends to) : 1 Actions : Is referred to in an episode in which she does: : not appear : 1 =========================================================================== Yar : Suggests that the Enterprise fight, upon : Actions : meeting another ship, etc. : 1 : Denise Crosby makes a guest appearance : 1 : Decks someone : 1 : Decks someone just to show her strength, etc. : 2 =========================================================================== Pulaski : Mispronounces Data's name : 1 : Calls Data "it" or accuses him of being unable: : to do something because he's an android : 1 : Cuts Picard off : 1 =========================================================================== Guinan : Makes someone sigh at the end of a talk : 1 : Talks about "her people" : 1 ===========================================================================

=========================================================================== Variations =========================================================================== "Engage", "Make It So", "Energize", "Accessing", "On Screen" and "Magnify" are shot words - you must take a drink unless you say the exact word _in unison_ with the dialogue. Two drinks if you say the wrong word.

Whenever Riker appears in a scene, the last person to say "Oink Oink" takes a drink.

If Troi "senses" something, everyone must stick a finger down their throats and make gagging sounds - last one to do so takes a drink. (This one could be dangerous in the latter stages of the game.)

At the start of a commercial break, guess who will do the next log entry. Take a drink if you're wrong. If there's no log entry, everyone drinks.

When Data launches into a long explanation, the last person to interrupt with "Thank you, Commander..." takes a drink. Doesn't count if you say it after it's said on the screen.

Whenever Wesley saves the ship, throw something at the TV. Take a drink if you don't hit Wesley.

Before the show, everyone predicts Dr. Crusher's hairstyle. Everyone who is wrong has to take a drink.

Whenever Troi gets a headache, drink until the headache subsides.

Before the show, everyone predicts Guinan's hat style (stop sign or teardrop). Everyone who is wrong has to take a drink.

Whenever Data embarasses himself, drink until somebody stops him. =========================================================================== Modification Date: September 6, 1991 ===========================================================================